The man who died sad
Once upon a time there was a man. He lost his father and brother in a war. It was the big war; the whole world was at it. He then had to migrate to another country because the victors were none too friendly towards those on the losing side; to the victors go the spoils; the losers and their families get the pleasure of giving up their prized and most dear possessions. But hey, this is ego land, that’s the game, right? Win, lose, cry, die, while the band plays and the parade moves on.
On the way to his new country, Australia, the man met a woman. She already had a daughter but he didn’t care. Love at first sight and all that beautiful stuff.
In Australia he worked in factories, often did double shifts, got things going. House, nice car, food on the table, the odd holiday. The step-daughter didn’t really warm to him but he figured giving her a roof over her head, clothes on her back, food in her stomach and an education was enough. It wasn’t.
As for the wife, they never got to be real close either. As long as he was bringing in the paycheck, providing a decent lifestyle, it was okay. She had a series of jobs too. Togetherness wasn’t a priority, working was.
They had a son, and the man loved him. But there too, time wasn’t devoted to nurturing. There were no fishing trips or quality time, as such.
After many years of this, existence, the man, now advanced in years, divorced. She got the lion’s share of the settlement, but he didn’t care, he was free of her.
The man decided to move to the countryside. In spite of advice from members of his family, who had followed him to Australia, he went ahead with the move. Although he didn’t say it, everyone suspected he wanted to move because he wished to be near the new woman in his life. Who it was thought was similar in attitudes to his ex.
Even though he was retired he stayed at home, refusing point blank to go out, make new friends, join clubs and whatnot, he just stayed indoors. The only semi regular visitor was the new woman. His son didn’t visit.
The man felt alone and abandoned was very sad and sorry. He often cried to his sister whom he’d come and see occasionally.
Then one day he died. At his sisters house. He died crying, in her arms.
I was told he died from a broken heart.
He left everything to his son, house, car, possessions and cash that he had saved up.
The son was very happy with the estate, and he found time to go to his fathers house; he went to clean up. To get what goods and chattels he took a fancy to. To mow the lawns before renting the place out. To get the nice almost new car, that sort of thing. And he was thrilled with the cash.
The moral of the story?
This man died sad, troubled and miserable. Yet some would say that he lived a good, honest life. He worked hard, very hard. He provided for his family. He sacrificed for those he loved. He believed in god. Paid his taxes. Never stole or cheated anyone. All the good boxes were ticked.
And yet he would have been lucky to have enjoyed more than handful of happy moments in his entire life journey.
Why? Because life isn’t about any of the things the man valued. Value those things and you are guaranteed pain, misery and heartbreak.
As the man I am talking about proves, beyond a shadow of doubt, work isn’t the answer. Sure we need to work, that’s just the way it is. But not to the point where work becomes the master and commander.
Money, isn’t the answer. He had money.
A nice house isn’t the answer either. His was nice.
Having a family, persay, is not the answer.
Here is the answer, a part of it anyway:
You need to become selfish.
That’s right. Become selfish.
Find things you enjoy doing, and do them.
If you have a significant other, do things together. Have lot’s of sex, have lots of laughs, have lots of crazy meaningless moments. Whatever rocks your boat. It beats working.
Waken your spirit.
Look beyond the clouds.
Have alone time. Meditate. Think about what’s important, really important.
See the reality of the world. Don’t let it scare you, but get to know that the so called reality of the world isn’t the reality.
Don’t blindly accept what your parents have drummed into you, what the government says is right, what the boss says is right. There is only one truth and none of the people mentioned are necessarily party to it.
Make sure that your kids, family and friends want to be around you, not because of your estate, but because they enjoy it.